Monday, February 27, 2006
The Brat and the rest of the Roush rats
How appropriate that Matt The Brat won at California Speedway. Of what I heard, it was the most boring race I've never watched. Of course, there was that rousing pre-race concert by Jewel. Excuse me but what the fuck does Jewel have to do with NASCAR? Does she rock? No. Is she country? LAWD no! Obviously she licks someone's helmet and the next thing you know race fans have to suffer through 10 minutes of her bullshit until the Green flag. (which is about as enjoyable as typhoid and hurricanes) Oh wait, but there was MORE!
Fantasia Buritto's rousing remdition of our National Anthem. She was great on Idol but why is she at a race track? In my opinion if you can't name a driver other than Jeff Gordon or Dale Jr than you shouldn't be allowed in the freaking door. You're just taking up space where someone who actually LOVES the sport could be standing. And don't even get me started on Nick Lachey being there, at least he wasn't stupid enough to sing.
Getting back to my original point (yes there was a point to this); it's incredibly appropriate that The Brat and his lame cast of team mates had the hat trick at Cali. Why? Because it's fucking boring and so are they. Matt wields his post-race venom, which is as deadly as a 3 year old with blunt scissors. I have all the respect in the world for the human prune, Mark Martin, but he's not exactly rum raisin in the world of ice cream. Greg Biffle, the hiliariously named Bug Eyed Dummy-thanks to Sterling "Rug Doctor" Marlin- isn't quite an exciting person to talk to either. Carl Edwards, the "aww shucks" attitude was cute at first but how many times can you listen to someone say how happy they are just to be there before it becomes a moot point? Just take your shirt off Carl and I'll be happy.
The saving grace on that team has to be Jamie McMurray. For one, any guy that Matt Kenseth hates has to be a decent human being. At least he doesn't stick his nose in the air and act like he's deaf when you approach him in the garage. Yeah, he hangs with Elliott "I never met a mirror I didn't like" Sadler, but he's one of the few single dudes on the circuit who he can go out cruising chicks openly with. Jamie's a good kid, a VERY talented driver, nice to look at, and what's best is you don't tend to nod off when you're talking to him; like his team mates. He has something to say and he'll make you laugh at the same time.
I never thought I'd hear myself say this but I wouldn't mind a few more Tony Stewart-like folks in the series! Someone has to keep the fans awake!
# posted by Green Green Green! @ 9:29 AM 
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Watch Brian Vickers: he can be Tony-like sometimes. If you get MRN or have NASCAR on XM, you can pick up on some of the stuff that TV misses. Thanks for the heads up. I think I like this blog!
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